Friday, February 5, 2010

Are You Vagazzled?


Here wanting to vagazzle or looking for vagazzling jewelry? Skip the post and try this link. Find some body glue and you can reuse your jewels a few times.

P.S and oh by the way... just in case you are wondering ... NO, vagazzling the vajayjay doesn't really involve the vagina, the labia, or the external genitalia at all.  

The stick-on jewels are applied (and yes, no need to pay somebody a fortune to stick them on for you - just click and order some sent quietly to the privacy of your home and you can do it yourself, or have your BFF, a trusted friend or lover stick them on) just above the area of the pubic hair, the mons pubis - or actually where the pubic hair once was before gals starting going all commando, or right above there if you happen to still have some hair down there. Seriously. It is no different than sticking temporary body art, tattoos or body jewel on your face, shoulder, neck, or arm.

{Seriously people really? Did you actually think we gals were sticking stuff on that part of our vajayjays? Really?

In other words, sexual relations are not affected, unless you count the possibility of her jewels getting caught in his down-there pubic hair, but then, guys are grooming all that away too, so ... carry on. 

FAQs - or my limited knowledge about stick on body jewelry:

1. Skin should be clean, hair free and free of any oils
2. Jewels have a simple, stick on adhesive - they are basically peel and stick
3. You can sleep in them, but they may fall off (get the glue)
4. You can shower in them, and swim, but water shortens their life - avoid rubbing the area where they are glued on
5.  They don't last forever, but you'll probably want to change designs, colors, etc. anyway

So grab that multipack here, and the body glue so you can stick them back on if any of them fall off, and get busy!

If you are really curious, grab Jennifer Love Hewitt's new book "The Day I Shot Cupid" to get the whole scoop on the entire vagazzle phenomena.  There's an entire chapter dedicated to it. Just click that link or the photo to get a copy.

Now... on to the opinion piece, and how this whole vagazzled vajayjay thing started, should you be so inclined. Otherwise - carry on!

Okay. Maybe it's my generation - not that we were prudes or anything. I mean, I am a child of the 60s for pete's sake. You know peace?  Love?  Groovy?  Make love not war?

And then there were the 80s. 'Nuff said.

Or, maybe it's my raisin' - I am a southerner.

And certainly yes, we gal pals talked about sexual issues sometimes. But among each other - and I have to say honestly that it just wasn't ever a primary topic that we engaged in because we usually had much more interesting stuff to talk about. Regardless, we certainly would never have broadcast it.  But these days with millions of women blogging, I discovered that - at least among a certain segment of female bloggers - "F" bombs and other curse words are used with ease and graphic talk about sex and sexual acts is not even blinked at ... even on blogs that are not centered around the topic of sexuality.  Some mommy bloggers promote sexual toys right in the midst of other endorsements for products for infants and toddlers.

Please understand I am not judging. Not at all. If that's your bag, then whatever makes you happy, brings you readership, brings you advertisers, yada yada - it's all good I guess. For me personally, I would be horrified to know that a family member, much less my own Mama or Daddy, or my grown son, might possibly happen upon my blog and read all that! There are just some things that aren't to be publicly discussed and I would simply die of embarrassment. And let me tell you, my Mama and Daddy are both deceased, and I'm over the age of 50, but I would still die, because I know in my heart and soul that somehow they still know exactly what I'm doing, when I do it, what I say and how I am behaving!! I just know it.  {Just writing this post might even be pushing it.}

And then of course, there's the whole God thing. Trust me, I'm not saying that I don't sometimes drop a bomb or three myself or misbehave in ways that I have to apologize to God the Father for (only about 5000 times a day), but ... it's behind closed doors, in my own home, between me and Him. And sometimes, by virtue of the fact that he's in the path of my meltdowns, The Cajun (my husband) gets to bear witness to it. Lucky him. But NEVER ever in a public forum! Nope. That's not for me, and while I can't say that I'll ever get used to this new attitude, I can say you won't see me being quite so openly expressive in my anger, or my language and certainly not my sexual habits!  I don't know ... maybe it's just good old fashioned southern restraint.

Anyway ... as if all of this isn't horrifying enough to me, Jennifer Love Hewitt, in a recent interview with George Lopez on his show Lopez Tonight, in speaking of her book, The Day I Shot Cupid, openly talked about - even bragged - about her disco ball bedazzled vajayjay, which she apparently tried for the first time after a break up.  Because the sparkly, Swarovski bejeweled vajayjay made her feel so good, she now makes sure she is "vagazzled" at all times. "It's great. It's cute, it's cute. It really helped me. It looks like a little disco ball down there it's great. Really." She, in fact, admitted that she vagazzled her vajayjay hot pink especially for ole George - or his show - I guess to match her pink dress. {Like what? Was she planning to vaflashflash show him?} She, in fact, thinks it's so great that she dedicated an entire chapter in her book - which is apparently about love and romance - to the art of vagazzling.

The Vagazzling Discussion starts at about 2:40

So, I guess there is a new trend of vagina jewelry. Stick on crystals for "down there."  Though I guess since I'm just now hearing about this, it's probably actually been around for awhile since Mississippi is not exactly known to be a trendsetter state. Which now that I think about it, might not be a bad thing.

A bedazzled vajayjay.

Seriously? Well, go for it then.

Check out Jennifer Love Hewitt's new book "The Day I Shot Cupid" to get the whole scoop on the entire vagazzle phenomena.  There's an entire chapter dedicated to it.


  1. Um...ew?
    I have no words.
    Tennessee isn't on the cutting edge of that either. Which I realize could have a double meaning here. Ouch!

  2. Gross. I'll stay back in the 60's thank you. And what are they talking about on Fox News this morning.....the "R" word? I'm clueless.

  3. WOW--I never heard of such a thing!! Who knew? I must be leading a very sheltered life. I agree--why do so many people have to talk of such things now? Do they have nothing else to speak of or nothing else to do to occupy their time. I remember being so embarrassed when "feminine products" commercials came on the TV and my Pa-Paw was in the room with us. Now they have commercials about ED and helpful "lotions" that give your fireworks. I'll take the "old days" back too!!

  4. As a native Mississippian and former resident of Tennessee, it is being done.... we just don't talk about it in public:)

  5. Okay...when I saw the title "Vagazzled" of this post in my sidebar, I thought, "Certainly she's not talking about what I think she's talking about". LOL. I mean, not that I think you a prude, but it seemed slightly out of character. I'm glad that I clicked to read and that it wasn't about your personal "vagazzlement". LMBO!

    I didn't see the interview, but I'm with you, there are just certain things that the whole world does NOT need to know. I'm of the opinion that the adornment or lack of adornment on your privates should remain just that...private. I don't care what people do, I just don't always need to hear about it. Thanks for the shock...and the laugh. : )

    Hope you have a great weekend!

  6. Mary, I'm sorry, but you are talking to a gal even older and more country than I don't want anything spelled out, but I am confused. And I'm thinking I'm glad I'm confused.

    I just can't follow how this business would work. Wouldn't the disco ball fall down and roll off, maybe even right in the grocery store? I can't imagine these hussies would have a nice clean pair of cotton undies on.

    I can't picture (ain't trying too hard) how it stays ON the individual.

    Guess I'll live in ignorance, because Midland Texas is about fifty years behind Mississippi.

    I saw some lady bloggers talking about PERSONAL THINGS of a CERTAIN NATURE on their blogs and never went back!

  7. @Lora, no kidding!
    @Granna Girl - forgive me for this but it has to do with one of the Obama fellas using the phrase 'F'ing retard' during some sort of closed door meeting.
    @Sheila - it was news to me too! I'm with you on those commercials .. every time they come on I'm like 'oh pleeeeeezzzeee'
    @Judi - exactly! I don't think we southerners are prudish, we just don't feel a need to discuss everything in public! I think decorating "down there" is sort of silly, but I don't care if somebody else wants to adore theirs! I just don't need to hear about it.
    @Krista LOL!! It would be very out of character for me to 1) decorate "down there" and 2) announce to the world that I had!! Glad to give y'all a laugh though! :)
    @Penniwig - though I have NO doubt in my mind that somebody would try to add a disco ball, Miss JLoH was saying that her little stick-ons made it look like a disco ball. And for her, I guess, that's a "Good Thing." (my apologies to Martha)

  8. Um, I guess maybe it's our age, I just don't know.

    In good 'ol Southern MO, we're still in the Bible Belt but with our young girls seeing this garbage on t.v., I'm sure they know all about "vagazzled"!

    I graduated from high school in 1972 and grew up in a time of women coming into their own. After all we were the generation who burned their bras. (Not where I'm from in MO but the metaphor was there).

    I've never been a prude in my life, but the blatant disregard or lack of modesty in some of the women today is surprising.

    I guess I'm just getting old. I still think there should be some things you don't tell the WHOLE world.

  9. Hmmmm...learn something new everyday, but like you, I'd sometimes rather remain in the dark on some issues. I've only visited one blog that is TOTALLY gross--which is such a shame because her recipes are really good. I just can't stand to wade through the filth to get to them. Like you, I'm not a prude, but some things do indeed need to remain "kept to ourselves" and not "aired" to every one and any one. Thanks for your good recipes, gardening news, pet updates, and all. I enjoy both your blogs. Keep up the good, clean work. CJ

  10. I'm with you...I just don't get the why...why would I want to know...I still have problems with sex scenes in movies...with 4 boys and trying to figure out the 'sex' talk, i gave them all this speech ( the gist is while you are dating and flirting, sexual feelings will present themselves, before you have sex, first think of why..God made sex first for procreation nad then to tie/bond couples together, so every time you must ask yourself if you will be able to deal with a child from this person and be bound together forever...there's more and much better explained while talking to them)...My sons says it's the one thing they remember every time they meet a girl they like. They tease me that it 'ruined' their social I will be 52 next week and I don't consider myself prude or unhip, but geez, have some respect and save some things for yourself!

    I now I must refrain from looking up more info on vagazzing...ewww, sounds too weird, but then tattoos near the vajayjay do too and that just blows my mind!

    Love you and your blog!!!

  11. So glad to know that there are many of us who feel the same way about keeping our business to ourselves.

  12. Oh Mary you are so right and so funny all at once! I think, being Floridian via Philadelphia, that these women, correction these girls, have no self respect. I'm with you and the others ladies 100%. I had my hand in raising a few wild girls beside my own boys. God and respect were my top demands. It's all about, how did say, ones raisin'. All we can do is pray for the world.


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